I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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