Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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