I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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