My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
