Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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