can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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