I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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