I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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