google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize
