Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
