He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize