plz talk dirty to me
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
thus making me awesome and them whores
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I'm always down for nudity.
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