no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
