we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
