I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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