Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
