Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
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