C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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