Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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