I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I love having hate sex.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
