I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize