everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!