just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
