I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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