i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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