he looks like a really good dad on facebook
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
