if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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