school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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