Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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