atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize