I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
