i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
