If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Randomize
