I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
