found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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