i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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