you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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