It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
