my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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