just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
