I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
