haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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