Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize