just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize
