You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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