That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
