My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
