Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.

Fav 20 5202 2478
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(563): View more from Iowa

I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?

Fav 24 3687 3883
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(770): View more from Georgia

She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.

Fav 29 6026 1603
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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(919): View more from North Carolina

its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.

Fav 73 8899 1728
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(913): View more from Kansas

I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.

Fav 3 2102 877
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(860): View more from Connecticut

I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season

Fav 6 2042 1066
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night

Fav 1 536 452
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(602): View more from Arizona

RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...

(480): View more from Arizona

IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY

Fav 0 45 9
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