After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
