So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
