Heybabeimwearingurpanties
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize