I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
